Alabamians’ Excellence

Three day. Supposed to be the day to foray into Nawth Alibam’s Shining City on the Hill but FD SCP laid down a command decision this morning and I am sitting at Castellum SCP waiting for the weather to destroy the place.

Although that’s supposed to be better than me being flipped by the winds while motoring.

So I am contemplating some rather amusing articles.

First, an article [Link] entitled “Stressed Out? You Probably Don’t Have it as Bad as People in Alabama, the Most Stressed State.” This is one of those firsts that is actually last, since it is a backwards insult. Simply put the denizens of Alibam are least able, of all those of the states of the Yankee republic, to cope with stress.

Why is this?

Perhaps the answer is another article [Link] entitled “Climate Change Is Stressing Us Out” that I saw almost immediately after the first.

How do Alibamians – in the mode – feel about climate change? Simple answer: deep denial. 

Why do people deny something? Reason 1: they have some scientific evidence that the something is fictional. Reason 2: they are insecure and can’t deal with the something rationally or emotionally.

Which do you think characterizes the majority, the mode as it were, of Alibamians?

Answer: Reason 2.

The problem is that when you deny something it doesn’t really go away and when it does raise its ugly, slobbering head you have to confront your insecurity.

Which stresses you out.

So we may hypothesize that Alibamians are better at insecurity and thereby denial, than the people of any other state in the Yankee republic.

This conjecture certainly seems to explain a LOT. A lot about the behavior of Alibamians. How they drive. How they behave towards other people. How they pick their politics and politicians. How they pretend to be something they aren’t. 

Which is sane.

Much less rational.

But to perhaps be fair, as a result of their choices, the general social environment in Alibam heightens the stress. How other people act. How they drive. How they pretend to be religionists. How they support an oppressive political regime in the state. How they support environmental gutting. 

And, of course, because all that stress and denial has a health unbenefit, people in Alibam die at a lesser age and thus stress out their offspring who know they will too.

Nurture wins again.

But this does at least give Alibamians something to brag about in the macho olympics: the can clearly withstand stress better than effete Yankees and all them oleaginous furriners.

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