Ho, Ho, Ho

I have finally found an aspect of the holidays to enjoy. I ran across an article [Link] this morning on the failure of UPS and FedEx to meet schedule on a rather SMALL number of packages. And when I read it I realized how amused I had been by all the pettiness and stupidity displayed on the news broadcasts.

Let’s us start with some basic knowledge. You may have n toilets in your house, typically n is magnitude three to five but that isn’t greatly important, but if you flush all the toilets simultaneously you are going to get some disappointment on what happens to the stercus. The basic idea reminds me of an episode of a television series about the Yankee Army Military Academy at West Point when I was a bairn. Some prank involving rupturing pipes, and bright students being suppressed (disciplined was the YA term) by anal faculty.

Point being is that every plumbing system is designed around some flow rate. It is seldom the maximum possible – every potty pushed at once! – but some moderate value. The reasons for this are a mixture of economic and esthetic. One doesn’t want one’s house to be dominated by plumbing; it isn’t a hamster run.

Now UPS and FedeX (and the Yankee government postal service – more later) are plumbing systems. They move stuff from point A to point B, with there being a lot of points of both intake and output. But fundamentally they are structured around some load capacity. And that capacity is determined in large part by some intermediate loading. For economic reasons. If UPS (e.g.) designed for Consumermas loading then it would be 0.9 idle almost all of the time. And it would go broke paying for guys in tacky brown uniforms, and big brown trucks and big brown airplanes (do you get the stercus analogy yet?) in a month or so. And then there would be no delivery system.

So when I got exposed to the whining from all the entitlement delusionals I had to reflect on just how arrogant and petty and above all, STUPID these folks are. When you overload a transportation system – plumbing – you are going to get some failures. Some things are going to get delivered late or to the wrong place. And it can’t be helped. It’s a price of having such a system. Your choices are to have a limited capacity system or none at all. Your pick. And think about that before you open your vocalizer and make a roaring FOOL of yourself for being too STUPID to keep your mouth shut under water.

And I promised to mention the Postal Service. Apparently the folks making stercus accidents of themselves have forgotten (or don’t know) of how the Yankee government postal service used to do this ALL the time. When I was a bairn there were always packages ordered from Sears or wherever that didn’t get delivered until around New Year’s. And then the postal service figured out their capacity and set a not-later-than date to get stuff to point B, a system firmly in place now and not bitched about by vacuum skulls.

So there is some humor in the holiday after all and it is the ferds who don’t know how plumbing works.