Be of Good Cheer

I am in need of some cheer, and not the bottled kind. Yesterday was one of those days when I regret living in the Yankee republic. In particular, I refer to the irrational way that we have cellular telephone service in this country. It is bad enough that the service is so bad here in Greater Metropolitan Arab, even less than the internet service in some ways, but to have to purchase a new phone periodically because the cellular provider decides it doesn’t like your old phone, which satisfies your needs nicely thank you, and is not broken, but to all intents and purposes the cellular provider wants nothing more than to make some more money today.

I must confess to rather envying my European colleagues for whom phone and service are separate matters. And, yes, they do consider this whole thing to be one more American insanity that will yet topple us from our arrogant perch. And for once I have to agree with them.

So on the cheering azimuth, I discover research from Northwestern U that indicates women are no smarter than men in picking mates. [Link] Despite being somewhat disillusioned after thinking all this time that FD SCP was being kind, I am cheered to find that that half of the human species is not inherently smarter than the other half – on this one thing! And it is an important thing since the selection of mates is one of the keystone pieces of what the biologists and anthropologists prate about. So if human females are not all that discerning in selecting genes for reproduction maybe selfdestruction is indeed built into us?

One of the nasty bits of being a scientist is that after you get through with an experiment you have to clean up after yourself. In fact, that’s one of the reasons I became a theoretician so that all the cleaning up I would have to do is disposing of crumpled paper and erasing the blackboard – those new whiteboards are just not very conducive to cogitation. Anyway, this work by the Borthwestern U folks may be viewed as supporting the mystical view of intelligent design or creationism, if the diety is a scientist, which is an azimuth the mystics studiously ignore since that would play merry ned with all their profits.

The point being however, that an ideal experiment is one that cleans up for itself after it has run its course, and that is what might be inferred from human females being willy nilly in selecting mates. If the human species is all part of some experiment of the diety then making them so they cleaned themselves up would be just good intelligent design.  And since we have now discovered this and are, at least in the most vacuous theory, capable of doing something about, that must indicate that the experiment has run its course and all that is left is clean up.

On an even more cheering matter, archaeologists in Peru have unearthed rather convincing indication that the Incas did indeed practice human sacrifice, presumably as part of their superstitious mystic fanaticism. [Link] This is a clear indication that the conquistadores were correct and despite their ulterior motives may actually have installed a slightly more benign mysticism in the form of the church of Rome. On the other hand, any totalitarianism that stifles a society capable of developing a cuisine based on guinea pigs is definitely superior to inquisition Spain.

And lastly, and most cheerily, is news from Scotland that the first ever countenance to adorn a bottle of Atlanta carbonated beverage is none other than the world’s greatest poet. [Link] Aye, bobbie himself! Why that is enough to make the gagging spew almost drinkable even with that fake corn sugar they use to make it instead of good honest cane sugar that rots the teeth and the mind simultaneously. Now if it were that Pepsi Throwback (R) it would be perfection, an indication that even those weirdings who make the rotting stuff had not only acknowledged the fundamental preeminence of Scots among the peoples of Tellus but had made the contents almost as potable as whisky.